It's Not Okay

by Pia Mattix Davis

As parents most of us have said to our children at sometime "it's OK".
But is it really OK or are we just attempting to silence the child's cries and
frustration instead of hearing what they have to say?

As parents we are responsible for helping our children to nurture
and develop their own voice, but when we tell them that it's OK,
we are negating what we are attempting to teach.
Instead we communicate that what the child is feeling right now
is not what they should feel.

So when your daughter falls off of her bike and hits her knee
on the ground, or  when your son is sad because someone
hurt his feelings, instead ask, "does it hurt", "are you in pain",  or "are you OK",
and allow your child to answer. If your child has yet to develop the
vocabulary to fully express his feelings, it is acceptable to offer choices
of words to help the child to identify and to communicate how
 they feel. 
It is never OK to tell the child how he or she feels.

The image above is a stock photo.